brokenxmyxheartxwillxmovexon's Xanga

Candice Esak Rocks LoL.sHe is OKaY.

Sun, 07 May 2006 14:49:17 GMT

tHAtS mE

Dorian knapp fan club

Sun, 07 May 2006 14:46:00 GMT

Okay,so there is no dorian fan club,(that I know of) but ths guy could have one,he's totally an amazing guy.Just because my slutty whore ex best friend was saying shit about him, that just doesn't mean it's true.Hes's one of the hottest guy thayt I've ever seen and I've seen alot.And he's hilarious,so funny it hurts.But lately I've been acting like he doesn't exist and being ruthelessly mean to him,but if kids knew I like him there would be mass chaos.

my sincerest apologies candice.

If I told anyone that the guy that I cheated with on one of my boyfriends was the guy I still had a thing for,nobody would ever trust me (as a faithfull girlfriend).

Fall Out Boy cd,I hurt I hate I used to trust,I still love and anorexic again

Mon, 17 Apr 2006 14:45:07 GMT

#14, 15 and 16 are amazing!they are the best songs this year for sure!the lyrics are awesome and the melody,it's so good.instant classics.
Mac broke up with me.I was so upset that I was falling on the ground crying.I didn't stop yet though.Well,I cried yesterdasy,and I didn't cry at all yet today.

.."I spent most of last night dragging this lake,for the corpses of all my past mistakes...""
...Let me tear you to peices.This is me wishipg you into the worst situations,I'm the kind of kid, that can't let anything go but you wouldn't kmnow a good thing if it came up and slit you're throught..." (one of the best parts of this song)
"...take you're taste back ,peel back you're skin,try and forget how it feels inside.,you should try saying no once in a while..."

I should try saying no once in a while.

"...This story is getting old,the home wrecker with the heart of gold,
I've got you locked up in a trunk in my mind,keep talking,keep this alive..."

"...True romance is dead,I shot it itn the chest and in the head..."

"...even when life's not living for,you're still worth lying for..."

I ussed to be the player what happened,I USED TO BREAK I HEARTS,GUESS THAT THIS IS MY PAY BACK.

"...I've never seen a heart I couldn't break..."

"...Wich came first,the music or the misery?..."

"...Love never wanted me,but I took it anyway...."

He didn't even give me a reason,so I canned him a few times,it felt good,but then I started criyng.I loved him.I don't love I hate,for me to love a person and to trust them is unbelivably stupid.I was so dumb,to belive him.You should see my wrist.Ps,they're all Fall Out Boy lyrics.Ohh,and for the anorexic thing,my ex is going out with a twig so I work out untill I either feel like puking or untill I feel like I'm going to pass out.Then five minutes later I am on it again.because I fell shitty and worthless,even if I do have another guy I still love mac but this guy wouldn't do this to me,he made me feell beautiful.He likes me for who I am and he notices the littlest things.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Mon, 17 Apr 2006 13:48:08 GMT

I am kinduh happy kuz like,I already have another boyfriend. i WON'T SAY HIS NAME THOUGH,BECAUSE SOME OF MY FRIENDS MIGHT GET MAD AND TELL ME THAT i SAID THAT i ALREADY GOT OVER HIM,WELL,i DID,BUT WHATEVER,HE WOULD NOT DO WHAT MY PREVIOUS HAS DONE TO ME.

Friday, April 14, 2006

Fri, 14 Apr 2006 21:42:00 GMT

Never Tell Me You Love ME YOU LIED.BUT FOR THE PAST 2 OR 3 WEEKS I Haven't loved you as much,I could feel the uneasyness you gave off.You could never understand me and you never loved me as much as you said you did!but I still love him.Never Tell Me You Love ME YOU LIED.BUT FOR THE PAST 2 OR 3 WEEKS I Haven't loved you as much,I could feel the uneasyness you gave off.You could never understand me and you never loved me as much as you said you did!but I still love him.

I only freaked out because he wouldn't tell me why and I bet he never thaught I would hurt him.

Friday, April 14, 2006

Fri, 14 Apr 2006 18:46:16 GMT

Yesterday I was broken up with.I felt like a fucking piece of shit.I was falling on the ground criing.But I didn't even like him that much.Okay , that was a half lie half truth.I loved him.He wouldn't tell me Why so I slit my wrists.I canned him 3 times.Then I went off to cry.If you know what song these pics are from you know how I feel.

Monday, April 10, 2006

Mon, 10 Apr 2006 12:36:37 GMT

Do you ever think that you have an "only one"?I used to,I'm not sure anymore.I think that maybe you have whole bunch of alomost-fitting other halfs,but you never know,you could have an only one <3

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Sun, 02 Apr 2006 14:11:14 GMT

Yesterday,I got really mad at my parents (I come from one of those dysfunctional families) and took this bracelet off that they gave me for a christmas present and chucked it in the mud.I was going to throw my ipod,but instead I threw something that had meaning to them away.I only miss that bracelet because it contained a childish hope of us being a better family.Fall Out Boy is my fave band!I went digging in a town trash heap to find a 14 page spread my mom threw out.

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Sat, 01 Apr 2006 17:11:21 GMT

"...She keeps repeating all that she needed
She says she's right here, she seems so distant

Saying goodbye this time, the same old story
Seeing you cry, makes me feel like saying sorry..."

Saying Sorry-Hawthorne Heights

I have this song stuck in my head.The words go in and out,and with no meaning they hurt,they have no reason to,but these lyrics hurt me.

Love is a roller coster,a few seconds you're up,the next you're down,what the heck?Life itself is the same roller coaster,but the front cars have no love and honestly don't care if they crash the next turn,the back does.Love really does make a differance,doesn't it?Without it,we're all just people.Nobody can be a hero,unless they have the absence of a lover in their heart.Or what else would they care to save?

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Sat, 01 Apr 2006 15:36:06 GMT

Love is like that Luba song,you know"...every time I see you're picture I cry,and I learn to get over you one more time..."